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What’s this? I cry as I emerge blinking from the wank cellar. A game? An actual new game with some buzz around it and graphics and absolutely no motherfucking deckbuilding? Rise from your graves, industry correspondents! The drought is over! The sun has risen on a new age of – oh I finished it in four hours. Well that was hardly worth turning off the wank cellar air conditioning. Yes, it’s Stray, a post-apocalyptic cyberpunk adventure thingummy-bollock with the central selling point that you play as a cutey wutey ickle wickle kitty witty and there’s a special dedicated meow button. I think a game where you play as a cat is unprecedented – non-anthropomorphic cat I hasten to add, before you Blinx the Time Sweeper loyalists come hassle my bollock sockets – dog people have had Okami and that one level from Call of Duty Ghosts but until now there’s never been an equivalent for the Garfield readers of the world. Probably because video games are by nature task-oriented and while a dog will follow commands as long as you feed them or praise them or continue to be in the same room as them, your average cat wouldn’t lift a paw to plug its own life support machine back in if it thought you were commanding it to do so.